Welp, that's the opening. Just a blank document. That's like every writer's worst nightmare.
She's decided to turn to her friends at brunch, but none of them have mans either.
Or ideas.
She's resorted to writing about socks. Socks and the City. See, now, I would read that.
Who the hell am I kidding? I would write that. XD
But no, it's 2001 and knitting is passe still.
Sam admits that she didn't even read Carrie's latest investigative journalism piece on Finding the Perfect french fry.
She's become irrelevant, and she's avoiding her editor because of it.
This'll go well.
Miranda tries to make her feel better by saying she never misses an episode, and Sam complains "You have a little man hanging from your breast, what else are you going to do?!" and Miranda says simply "eat" and it's so fucking awkward for anyone who doesn't know how ravenous one gets while nursing.
Actually its just awkward.
Carrie's still complaining, "I'm not getting laid, therefore I'm getting laid off." Geez, she needs a fucking hobby.
Charlotte offers to take her trolling for men in the park. Sam orders the fruit plate and admits that she's decided to get back together with Richard all in one breath.
wh- wh- what?!
Sam explains that he explained it all away. He was scared and that's what made him slip his thingy inside her hoo haw.
Then Charlotte creates the best Gif in the whole show:
LOL forever.
Sam says it's difficult for men to admit they have feelings.
Miranda says she correctly identifies her feelings all the time, but it doesn't excuse her for being an asshole if she's being an asshole.
Sam rationalizes the whole thing-- "some men can't be bothered to pick up the dry cleaning" Therefore, cheating on her is Richard's flaw.
Miranda is irate about it and I don't blame her.
Sam insists that Richard was being genuine and she's giving him another chance.
So now Carrie has a supreme idea for an article, "Desperate women who'll believe anything."
--
At Chez Miranda, she and Steve are covering outlets and locking the toilets. Their baby is like 1 month old, this is ridiculous.
Steve tells Miranda that he thinks they should get the baby baptized. Miranda is an atheist and she doesn't want to.
Honestly that should be it, but Steve presses that they're covering outlets even though the baby can't crawl yet. So therefore they should protect the baby's soul from turning into a flying head with wings.
I.. got nothing.
She acquiesces. It's just water on the baby's head in the end.
Course, she has to pick a godmother for it. So, she chooses Carrie.
Carrie thinks she should go with someone more maternal, like Charlotte. Also, she says she's about one bad date away from bitter.
But Miranda insists that Carrie should do it.
I'm getting ahead of myself a little bit.
The reason Carrie is even thinking about her state of bitterness is because her editor finally found her and... They want to make a book out of her columns! :O
So, the show has come full circle back to the book. crazy pants. She meets with these potential publishers, and they need her to write an opening for the book-- something that sets the tone. Hopeful or... should the publishers just shoot themselves now?
Carrie has to put her best fake smile on.. yeah, hopeful! There's someone out there for everyone. For sure.
Abso-fucking-lutely.
So, Carrie is deep in pessimism when Miranda asks her to take on the role.
I don't know what hope v. pessimism has to do with being a godmother, but whatever. No one is expecting her to do magic or anything. She already *has* that role, if you think about it.
--
Oy, I forgot about Charlotte. During their trolling at the park party, Charlotte points out that Carrie is way too cynical. She won't have imaginary sex with any of the men who they see walk by!
Why, I never!
So, She invites Carrie to see a motivational speaker that Charlotte has been obsessed with. Carrie doesn't see why she'd go to it.
"Because you're becoming pessimistic?"
"See, that's why I wouldn't go."
She's got a point.
Well, they go together. And the whole place is a nut.
They get little affirmations as they walk in, and Carrie openly mocks them.
"Are you going to make fun of everything?" Charlotte asks.
"No, I'm not that quick."
I love Pessimist Carrie. I wish she'd stick around. She seems like she'd be great at parties.
Carrie tells Charlotte off-handedly that Miranda asked Carrie to be godmother and Charlotte is upset because Carrie isn't taking it seriously. And she isn't taking the motivational speaker seriously either.
The motivational speaker lady is talking and saying absolutely nothing of value. The point of the whole thing is to find love, and essentially how if you don't have a man it's you're fault. It's really shitty, tbh. Some woman in the audience (probably a plant) raises her hand to brag about how she found a husband thanks to the motivational speaker.
See, I told you she was a plant. What was she *doing* there if she's happily with a dude? Did she really go just to brag about it and make the women there feel bad about not being successful with men. Never mind, I wouldn't put it past her.
So, Charlotte is emboldened by the question-asker to talk about her own problems.
She says that she feels like she's losing hope because she believed so hard that she'd find love if she sent love out into the world (or whatever the affirmations are supposed to be about). She did find a man and it completely fell apart. She sort of blames the motivational speaker for losing her optimism and not finding a new love now, and I honestly don't blame her.
It's sort of like the whole Joshua Harris 'I kissed dating goodbye' purity culture bullshit from when I was a teenager. That shit fucked up so many young women (and probably men, too), especially the ones who actually waited to have sex and date and then their marriages fell apart or became abusive. He *promised* that god would bless them and a lot of them just ended up divorced or abused or disenfranchised. Just sadfaces all over.
The motivational speaker lady is not deterred. She is adamant that Charlotte just doesn't believe enough, and that if she really believed that she'll find a man.
Carrie stands up for her friend (even though Charlotte is mad at her). If anyone is the hopeful optimist, it's Charlotte and how very dare this woman suggest she's not trying hard enough.
here here!
I daresay I like Carrie a lot in this episode.
Miranda, meanwhile, is navigating a very frustrating ordeal. She has to go to a church and talk to a priest about the baptism, she has to meet Steve's mother, and on top of everything she has to buy little Brady a dress for the baptism.
Oh the humanity!
At the baptism in the end, Carrie asks Miranda once and for all whether Carrie is maybe too cynical to be godmother. "Not compared to me." Miranda says and insists that she do it since Carrie is her best friend.
Miranda also says, "I don't know if I believe in any of it, but I believe in you. I want you to be my baby's godmother." And they both have tears in their eyes and it's sweet.
"Well, I did spring for the hat." Carrie replies very cutely.
In the end, Carrie gets some of the holy water on her arm and thinks maybe it washed off some of her original "sinicism".
--
At Sam's end, well, maybe her middle, she talks to Richard about the past indiscretions. He lamely rationalizes them all away and then gives Sam a big ol' diamond ring, but not *that* kind of diamond ring.
Her friends actually did plant a seed or two of doubt in her mind. So, she's on her guard around him. She forces him to go to church with her, to Brady's baptism, and while there he recites one of the catholic whatstits with the rest of the Catholic people present and somehow that makes him look more respectable to Sam's eye for some reason.
At the after party, Richard approaches Miranda to tell her that he really was scared.
"Ok, whatever. Thanks for coming." She says the only thing she can at that point. Awkward.
Sam leaves with him, and Miranda says to the other two, "He's such a player."
Charlotte has regained her optimistic composure, "I dunno, maybe things'll work out between them." and Carrie almost chokes on her cake.
Carrie spends the last moment dedicating her book to her friend Charlotte "The eternal optimist who always believes in love."
d'aww.
I enjoyed that episode a lot more than I have in previous viewings.
Thanks for reading along and Happy Thanksgiving! <3
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