Season 5 Episode 2 Unoriginal Sin

So, one side-effect of a season without mans is a season without inspiration for Carrie.  Remember how she's still writing that relationship column?  Yeah, me neither.

Welp, that's the opening.  Just a blank document.  That's like every writer's worst nightmare.

She's decided to turn to her friends at brunch, but none of them have mans either.

Or ideas.

She's resorted to writing about socks.  Socks and the City.  See, now, I would read that.

Who the hell am I kidding? I would write that.  XD

But no, it's 2001 and knitting is passe still.

Sam admits that she didn't even read Carrie's latest investigative journalism piece on Finding the Perfect french fry.

She's become irrelevant, and she's avoiding her editor because of it.

This'll go well.

Miranda tries to make her feel better by saying she never misses an episode, and Sam complains "You have a little man hanging from your breast, what else are you going to do?!" and Miranda says simply "eat" and it's so fucking awkward for anyone who doesn't know how ravenous one gets while nursing.

Actually its just awkward.

Carrie's still complaining, "I'm not getting laid, therefore I'm getting laid off."  Geez, she needs a fucking hobby.

Charlotte offers to take her trolling for men in the park.  Sam orders the fruit plate and admits that she's decided to get back together with Richard all in one breath.

wh- wh- what?!

Sam explains that he explained it all away.  He was scared and that's what made him slip his thingy inside her hoo haw.

Then Charlotte creates the best Gif in the whole show:

 LOL forever.

Sam says it's difficult for men to admit they have feelings.

Miranda says she correctly identifies her feelings all the time, but it doesn't excuse her for being an asshole if she's being an asshole.

Sam rationalizes the whole thing-- "some men can't be bothered to pick up the dry cleaning" Therefore, cheating on her is Richard's flaw.

Miranda is irate about it and I don't blame her.

Sam insists that Richard was being genuine and she's giving him another chance.


So now Carrie has a supreme idea for an article, "Desperate women who'll believe anything."

--

At Chez Miranda, she and Steve are covering outlets and locking the toilets.  Their baby is like 1 month old, this is ridiculous.

Steve tells Miranda that he thinks they should get the baby baptized.  Miranda is an atheist and she doesn't want to.

Honestly that should be it, but Steve presses that they're covering outlets even though the baby can't crawl yet.  So therefore they should protect the baby's soul from turning into a flying head with wings.

I.. got nothing.

She acquiesces.  It's just water on the baby's head in the end.

Course, she has to pick a godmother for it.  So, she chooses Carrie.

Carrie thinks she should go with someone more maternal, like Charlotte.  Also, she says she's about one bad date away from bitter.

But Miranda insists that Carrie should do it.

I'm getting ahead of myself a little bit.

The reason Carrie is even thinking about her state of bitterness is because her editor finally found her and... They want to make a book out of her columns! :O

So, the show has come full circle back to the book. crazy pants. She meets with these potential publishers, and they need her to write an opening for the book-- something that sets the tone.  Hopeful or... should the publishers just shoot themselves now?

Carrie has to put her best fake smile on.. yeah, hopeful!  There's someone out there for everyone. For sure.

Abso-fucking-lutely.

So, Carrie is deep in pessimism when Miranda asks her to take on the role.

I don't know what hope v. pessimism has to do with being a godmother, but whatever.  No one is expecting her to do magic or anything.  She already *has* that role, if you think about it.

--

Oy, I forgot about Charlotte.  During their trolling at the park party, Charlotte points out that Carrie is way too cynical.  She won't have imaginary sex with any of the men who they see walk by!

Why, I never!

So, She invites Carrie to see a motivational speaker that Charlotte has been obsessed with.  Carrie doesn't see why she'd go to it.

"Because you're becoming pessimistic?"

"See, that's why I wouldn't go."

She's got a point.

Well, they go together.  And the whole place is a nut.

They get little affirmations as they walk in, and Carrie openly mocks them.

"Are you going to make fun of everything?" Charlotte asks.

"No, I'm not that quick."

I love Pessimist Carrie.  I wish she'd stick around.  She seems like she'd be great at parties.

Carrie tells Charlotte off-handedly that Miranda asked Carrie to be godmother and Charlotte is upset because Carrie isn't taking it seriously.  And she isn't taking the motivational speaker seriously either.

The motivational speaker lady is talking and saying absolutely nothing of value.  The point of the whole thing is to find love, and essentially how if you don't have a man it's you're fault.  It's really shitty, tbh.  Some woman in the audience (probably a plant) raises her hand to brag about how she found a husband thanks to the motivational speaker.

See, I told you she was a plant.  What was she *doing* there if she's happily with a dude?  Did she really go just to brag about it and make the women there feel bad about not being successful with men. Never mind, I wouldn't put it past her.

So, Charlotte is emboldened by the question-asker to talk about her own problems.

She says that she feels like she's losing hope because she believed so hard that she'd find love if she sent love out into the world (or whatever the affirmations are supposed to be about). She did find a man and it completely fell apart.  She sort of blames the motivational speaker for losing her optimism and not finding a new love now, and I honestly don't blame her.

It's sort of like the whole Joshua Harris 'I kissed dating goodbye' purity culture bullshit from when I was a teenager.  That shit fucked up so many young women (and probably men, too), especially the ones who actually waited to have sex and date and then their marriages fell apart or became abusive.  He *promised* that god would bless them and a lot of them just ended up divorced or abused or disenfranchised. Just sadfaces all over.

The motivational speaker lady is not deterred.  She is adamant that Charlotte just doesn't believe enough, and that if she really believed that she'll find a man.

Carrie stands up for her friend (even though Charlotte is mad at her).  If anyone is the hopeful optimist, it's Charlotte and how very dare this woman suggest she's not trying hard enough.

here here!

I daresay I like Carrie a lot in this episode.

Miranda, meanwhile, is navigating a very frustrating ordeal.  She has to go to a church and talk to a priest about the baptism, she has to meet Steve's mother, and on top of everything she has to buy little Brady a dress for the baptism.

Oh the humanity!

At the baptism in the end, Carrie asks Miranda once and for all whether Carrie is maybe too cynical to be godmother. "Not compared to me."  Miranda says and insists that she do it since Carrie is her best friend.

Miranda also says, "I don't know if I believe in any of it, but I believe in you. I want you to be my baby's godmother." And they both have tears in their eyes and it's sweet.

"Well, I did spring for the hat." Carrie replies very cutely.

In the end, Carrie gets some of the holy water on her arm and thinks maybe it washed off some of her original "sinicism".

--

At Sam's end, well, maybe her middle, she talks to Richard about the past indiscretions.  He lamely rationalizes them all away and then gives Sam a big ol' diamond ring, but not *that* kind of diamond ring.

Her friends actually did plant a seed or two of doubt in her mind.  So, she's on her guard around him.  She forces him to go to church with her, to Brady's baptism, and while there he recites one of the catholic whatstits with the rest of the Catholic people present and somehow that makes him look more respectable to Sam's eye for some reason.

At the after party, Richard approaches Miranda to tell her that he really was scared.

"Ok, whatever. Thanks for coming." She says the only thing she can at that point.  Awkward.

Sam leaves with him, and Miranda says to the other two, "He's such a player."

Charlotte has regained her optimistic composure, "I dunno, maybe things'll work out between them." and Carrie almost chokes on her cake.

Carrie spends the last moment dedicating her book to her friend Charlotte "The eternal optimist who always believes in love."

d'aww.

I enjoyed that episode a lot more than I have in previous viewings.

Thanks for reading along and Happy Thanksgiving! <3

Season 5 Episode 1 Anchors Away

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Season 4 Episode 18 I Heart New York

Soooo. This episode is kinda hard to snark-- it's sweet and I daresay Carrie is almost relatable here.

It's the season finale, and according to the show writers is a love letter to New York.  I think that the remainder of the show is a love letter to New York-- the writer's have always had a Stockholm Syndrom-like affinity for the city that always reeks.  (I assume)  And after 9/11 we all got kinda crazy and the show reflects that in an embarrassing way in the next episode. But I'm getting ahead of myself.  We're not talking about next episode yet.

This episode is the one where the show gives the audience Amnesia about Big.  It's funny how much more people love you when you are leaving.

:record scratch:

You heard that right! Big is getting out of dodge and moving as far away from Carrie as he can get-- Napa, California.

How does Carrie find this out?  If you thought Big told her over the phone then you haven't been paying attention.

The show starts with Carrie putting a blanket on her bed.  She's cold, cause Fall is finally coming to New York for the first time in 5 years.  It reminds her of how lonely she's been since Aiden left and she decides to give Big a ring. Err. A phone call.

It must be late, cause he checks his watch before picking up and they have a cute little back-and-forth like old times.  She decides to come over and brings him a pizza.  It must be really late at this point.  Carrie really is rude sometimes-- calling after bedtime is bad enough, but inviting yourself over is too much.  But Big's OK with it, so I guess it's OK.

She is stunned when she walks through his door-- all the furniture is gone and there's a bunch of boxes about.

And this is how she finds out the bastard is leaving. Did I say this episode would be difficult to snark? What was I thinking?!

He still has his vinyls out and a player, so they dance to Moon River and it is slow and sexy and sweet and you think that Carrie might just forget that he *wasn't going to tell her that he's leaving until he already left* and sleep with the dude.

Did I say that this show gives you amnesia?  I think the amnesia is wearing off.

Fortunately the record starts skipping and Carrie is shaken from his spell and leaves.  She leaves him the pizza which is sweet.  There's nothing like leftover pizza for breakfast.

Next day she is at brunch with the foursome discussing whether she should have 'Going out of Business' sex with Big.

"No." Miranda says with a belly full of baby.

Actually she says it three times, and the timing is kind of perfect:

"OK Quick draw give it a second here"

"No."

"We like each other. We respect each other.* It could be nice, romantic."

"hmm. No."

*How is Big respectful of Carrie?  He didn't even Tell her that he was Leaving.

So Miranda and I are team Don't Do It, Do You Have Amnesia? What Are You Thinking?

Sam is team If The Sex Is Nice, Who Cares?

Charlotte chimes in with worry about her getting pulled back in to "all that Big stuff"

"He's not Niagara Falls!" Carrie says.

"Isn't he?" Miranda points out. (rightly)

"I love you sweety," Carrie talks directly to the audience, "but you're not giving me any credit.  This is not 2 years ago.  Things have changed, I'm different now, Big and I are different now."

I can't tell if ultimately she's trying to convince Miranda, the Audience, or herself.

It's not working on me, (or Miranda) I can tell you that much.

Carrie goes on to talk about how safe she feels around the dude who was going to disappear without a trace, and how he was a Great Love in her life and he's leaving.

It's the first time the show uses the term Great Love and it's Important for the next season.  It's next season's "Big Bad"  err.. Bad Big?

"You had sex with Steve!" Charlotte points out Miranda's hypocrisy, but Miranda points to her swollen belly.  Checkmate!

Writer Carrie's exposition has to do with fate, and the stars and how you can't see the stars in New York so it's no wonder everyone is lost.

erhm.. Honey, he wasn't going to tell you he was leaving.  That is the only important thing you need to know about this-- it wasn't fate that brought you to his door before he left.  It was dumb luck.  He's a bad man.

"Make the Bad Man Fly!"

She decides to go on one last hurrah with the bad dude.  But first she needs some new shoes.  She picks the ugliest pair I've ever seen, but good for her.  Whatever.

--
Sam and Richard are about to meet a firey end.

oop, wrong show. No dragons here.

Sam is upset because Richard doesn't love her the way she wants to be loved.  It's tearing her up inside because she didn't actually think she needed love-- but it turns out the heart wants what it wants.

He won't hang up the picture of the hearts she gave him.  She freaks out in the least Sam-like way imaginable.  It is so far out of character I kind of hate it.

She becomes this jealous raging harpy, hell bent on forcing him to love her.  He needed to end it as soon as she started acting this way, but instead he decides to cheat on her.

At their end, Sam finds him between her legs in the porniest porn pose ever.  It would have been funny if it weren't for Sam throwing the heart picture across the room, shattering it.  Oh wait, that was funny.

She's also in a wig, and Richard didn't even recognize her at first.

Here seems like a good place to talk about Charlotte.  She doesn't have a huge role in the episode.  She's working her job as a docent at the MOMA when who should show up but her Ex and his Mother, Bunny.

She quickly moves the tour group through the exhibit and away from the land mine who -detests- Monet.  What kind of a monster Detests Monet??!

She quickly accepts a date from a dude who had worked up the courage to ask her before Trey and his mother showed up.  She's totally over Trey now. mmhmm. yep.

The date doesn't work out so well.  Charlotte is quite Rich at this point, and the dude cannot handle it.  So right before Charlotte ushers him out of her abode, he shouts "It goes all the way back there?!" and Charlotte is right back where she started. Well, at least she put herself out there.
--

Steve and Miranda are putting together the crib. I'll never understand these sorts of scenes-- these boxed furnitures are not that difficult to assemble.  I watched this episode with the Commentary on one time, and he said that the role of 'dude' in these situations is being played by Miranda.  It makes me shake my damn head in frustration.  I don't understand why she didn't just assemble the thing herself.  It's what I would do.

Blah.

It's not really about the crib, it's a pretext for Steve and Miranda to talk about the future name of their son.  Steve suggests "Paul" and Miranda mentally vetoes it and says she wants to name him "Danny."  she should have gone with that.  Danny Brady is much better than Brady Brady. Or Brady Hobbes-Brady or Brady Brady-Hobbes (you know when they eventually get married in the sixth season, oop Spoilers!)

Did Miranda forget that Steve's last name was Brady when she named him?  Is the amnesia spreading? Why doesn't Steve say anything?  Obviously Miranda hasn't taken two seconds to think about how Brady will feel about being named after his father's surname, even accidentally.  It's quite bizarre if you ask me.

After Miranda tells Steve the name of their son, Steve starts crying and Miranda tells him to stop.

Shut the fuck up Miranda.  He's allowed to be emotional about his future child.

--

The morning before their Big date, Carrie has to ask permission from Miranda.  She says she's decided to sleep with Big, "...If it feels right.  So put that in your pipe and smoke it!"

"Well you're a big girl." Miranda has given up.  I mean, it's the healthiest thing to do.  Plus, she has more important things to worry about. Her Braxton hicks are a little less Braxton a little more Early Labor.  But she doesn't know that yet.

Miranda asks Carrie if she'll be there for the birth, and Carrie can't refuse.  Off-screen she gives her a spare cell phone because Carrie hasn't bought herself one yet even though Miranda told her to buy one at the Birthday Fiasco in Episode 1 of this season.

And then she's off on her whirlwind date with Big.  She goes all out: Dinner and Dancing followed by a lovely romantic carriage ride through the city.  And just as she starts snogging the bad dude, her phone rings and it's Miranda and she's in labor.

Carrie should have pulled a her and had sex with him on the way to dinner.  Their sex plans are completely spoiled by Miranda, mwahahaha, just as she planned.  Probably.

Instead of leaving the park and grabbing a cab, Big tells the hansom cab driver to take them to the hospital.  He's not allowed to leave the park, but Big gives him a lot of money to break the law.

This is just so stupid.  It's supposed to be romantic, I think, but really it's irksome.  Big is such an asshole.

ANYWAY.

Now it's time for Carrie's shoes to meet a watery end.

oop, wrong show again!  No dragons here!

Almost as soon as Carrie comes in the room, Miranda's water breaks all over Carrie's fancy new shoes.

Why didn't Carrie stop at home first and change?  Labor can last awhile, especially for first babies.  She show has the labor lasting through the night and well into the next day. That's a long time to be stuck in 4 inch stilettos.  Just saying.

So, Next day Miranda poops out a kid and it's perfectly Miranda the way she does it.  She doesn't like the 'push push, you can do it, cheerleader shit' so when the nurse goes nuts over how perfect little Brady is Carrie tells her kindly to stop.  Good friend.

Although that nurse is a good nurse.  I figure once you've seen a handful of births the novelty kind of wears off.

Steve is there, emotional, where Miranda is stoically looking at her baby.  I know at a certain point she'll bond with him, but it isn't now.  She's holding him as if it isn't her baby and it's making me sad for her.  Miranda tells Steve about the name change, and Steve starts crying again.  Miranda looks to Carrie who tells Steve to stop.

He's Allowed To Be Emotional.  Gods.  Someone should be about this GD baby. Fuck.

Carrie rushes from the hospital after an appropriate amount of oohing and aahing over the baby.  She meets Charlotte in the waiting room and tells her all about how teeny little Brady is and how he has red hair like his Mom. Charlotte appropriately squees and Sam shows up, still in her wig.

"Why are you wearing that wig?" Charlotte asks her.

"Because my hair under it looks like shit." Sam says like it's obvious she was just spying on her now-ex-boyfriend.

"Miranda has a son." Charlotte side steps that whole topic.

"Just what the world needs, another man." Sam says and they both go to see the bouncing baby boy.

Carrie is late to see Big.  For some reason she has the ability to just walk into the now-vacant apartment. In the background is that big red wall of yore.

Big has left a note for her though.

It's the vinyl they were listening to, and the words "If you ever feel lonely-"

There's also an envelope "If I ever feel lonely" and it's plane tickets to California.

The music turns back to Moon River and Carrie goes out to the sidewalk and interacts with a stunningly obvious CG leaf.

Oh, I just got it.  Big is Leafing.  XD

Narrator Carrie talks about how the new season has officially begun.

uh.. nope, it's the finale.

"Maybe our mistakes make our fate. Without them, what would shape our lives? Perhaps if we never veered off course, we wouldn't fall in love or have babies or be who we are. After all, seasons change. So do Cities. People come into your life, and people go. But it's comforting to know, the ones you love are always in your heart and, if you're very lucky, a plane ride away."

3 things.

1) Most people don't consider falling in love an accident or mistake.

2) Some, no I daresay most people who have them, plan on having babies. XD

3) Carrie doesn't fly.  We'll learn this next season when she takes a train for three horrible days rather than fly to California.

In conclusion, I think this episode is a really good set-up for the events in the next two seasons.  Mistakes making your fate is the theme of the next episode as well, although I think it's done better then.  There's a better metaphor anyway.

For all my bitching, I do like this season a lot.

I hope you'll join me next time for the fifth season premiere!  Hopefully  I can get through the season quickly, there are only 8 episodes. Should take me... mmm, about 6 months. XD

Love you guys! thanks for reading!